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Learning How To Date Yourself (Too)

Hello, hello my amazing readers! Thank you so much for joining me again for another blog. My goal for this week's blog is to help you understand that it's okay to date yourself and do more things independently. In the past, I truly believed that experiencing things was not worthwhile unless I was with someone else or unless I was dating someone. However, overtime I have grown a lot more comfortable doing things alone. I might even say I've grown into more of an introvert than I was before.

Although I do believe I can also say that am a very introverted extrovert.

Lately, I've been seeing a lot of people post on social media about romanticizing their lives, and honestly I am absolutely living for it. Part of me believes that the only way we are going to get anything out of life is if we do exactly this. In other words, sometimes we may need to learn how to make things seem even greater than they are. I know...okay lol it sounds kind of awful when I put it that way. What I mean is as simple as the saying "you get back what you put in". This not only goes for the physical effort but also the mental effort as well. I find that it is extremely easy to get caught up in the negatives because of the fact that our brains have been pre-disposed to this thought pattern. It is pure psychological nature when it comes to the human brain (unfortunately). This is why it is so important to try your best to see your life in a more positive light. Don't get me wrong...feel what you need to feel. Life is not always good and I completely understand that we need to confront these negative emotions and have time to actually feel them. It is 100% a natural thing to feel. It's just when we start living in it and giving it space to "spread" that it becomes more problematic. In my opinion, negativity is metaphorically a 'disease' that constantly feels the need to spread from person to person and energy to energy. It makes life so much less desirable and has been extremely detrimental to our own personal health but also to the health of those around us. This is why I truly believe in learning how to be more passionate about our own individual lives. After all, we are the main characters of our lives.

You see...I've always had this thought growing up that in order to be happy you had to be with someone. I thought I always needed someone to experience things with in order to reach my happiest state with each life event and experience. My brain lied to me for years on end. Of course, it is so beautiful to share these experiences with my friends and family. I love spending time with the people closest to me and spending time with others is extremely important for our social wellness. However, it is also important to find that comfort in yourself to do these things alone too, because you are the only one who will always be there for yourself. You are your own constant best friend and life partner. It is important to build a positive relationship with yourself just as much as it is with everyone else.

I understand it can be extremely scary trying something new alone. I promise you that I do want you to do whatever is most comfortable for you. It is okay if you need someone there with you. I think what I am trying to get at in this blog is that it is okay to date yourself and to treat yourself as you would expect someone else to treat you. It is okay to go out for a coffee alone or to treat yourself to a nice dinner alone or just do anything you normally would do with someone else but alone. It is totally okay for you to create new memories where it's just you and you.

I've created a list of 'date idea's' you could do to treat yourself on a lil' one-on-one date with yourself. However, if you feel more comfortable being with someone else that is okay too! These idea's will work for multiple people as well.

25 Date Idea's for You, Yourself, & You

  1. take a walk down by the water or at your place

  2. treat yourself to some ice cream and go stargazing

  3. take yourself out to dinner at a restaurant you've always wanted to go to

  4. get some coffee and sit down by the water to reflect on your life and thoughts

  5. go for a beach day

  6. go see a movie you've been wanting to see

  7. set up a full movie day at home with your fav snacks and drinks

  8. take yourself out on an Ikea date

  9. go out on a boat tour and get a little 'touristy'

  10. plan a dinner date at home for yourself with your fav meal and your fav alcoholic or non-alcoholic drink

  11. go ice skating and grab some hot cocoa

  12. go swimming under the stars (as long as it is safe for you to do so)

  13. take yourself to a farmer's market

  14. grab something warm to drink and enjoy the sunrise or sunset

  15. enjoy a nice picnic in the park and bring a good book to read

  16. sign up for a yoga or fitness class

  17. plan a trip to the spa for some peaceful alone time

  18. register for a workshop or fun event

  19. go visit an art gallery or museum

  20. Redecorate and accessorize your living space

  21. go to your fav bakery or local shop

  22. take yourself to a play or a musical

  23. take a road trip to a national park and spend a weekend away in nature

  24. buy yourself some pretty flowers for your living or office space

  25. go for a run on the beach or at your fav outdoor area

There are obviously endless amounts of things you could find to do solo or with someone else. This is just a short list to get you thinking about your next independent adventure.

The very first time I ever tried something out alone I was literally so nervous. I kept thinking about how boring it might be or what other people would think of me or what would happen if something went wrong for me. I felt so nervous going into it and, in all honesty, I kinda felt like a bit of a 'loser' too. But in that moment I also didn't know how much I would grow from those experiences. Now, I feel so empowered being able to do things on my own and on my own time without feeling that need to have someone there with me. It has made me feel so much more capable of enjoying and loving life in my own skin. Although I will admit that I do enjoy making plans with my friends and family as well.

I do highly recommend doing a solo adventure at some point in your life though. It truly does play a significant role in how you see yourself and how you see your life as well. It switches things up and it gives you more time and space to feel safe in who you are and what you want to do with your life. I do want you to feel comfortable as well though, so feel free to do any of those idea's with a friend, family member, or significant other too.

I am sending you guys all of the positive energy and love on your journey to independence and also just your life journey in general as well. Thank you again for being a part of this community and for listening to what I have to say. Happy Tuesday and I hope y'all have an amazing rest of your week. Please feel free to reach out through my contact page if you need me or if you just wanna chat. xx

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